Even for those who are called to write and preach, there are times when there seems to be nothing left to write. We know those moments will pass and if they don’t, then whatever we have will be our offering. Each week there is a new story to tell about the resurrection. If we can find it.
There is nothing left to write
not because there is nothing left to say.
(How can we ever be done proclaiming the resurrection?
How can we run out of Good News?)
There is nothing left to write
because I do not have the energy to write it.
I am too weary to put the words together,
to record them,
to edit them,
to upload them to YouTube.
There is nothing left to write
so I pray
that when I cannot form the words
or put them to paper
that the Holy Spirit would groan on my behalf,
searching the depths of Christ in me,
deep calling out to deep,
resurrecting my call to tell the story, and
give me something to write.
A prayer from the Psalms: Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my help and my God. My soul is cast down within me; therefore I remember you from the land of Jordan and of Hermon, from Mount Mizar. Deep calls to deep at the thunder of your cataracts; all your waves and your billows have gone over me. By day the LORD commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me, a prayer to the God of my life. Amen. – Psalm 42:5-8 (NRSV)
You said a lot for not having anything to say. You captured what many, for certain me, are feeling these days.
Beautifully done, Michelle.
I’ve got maybe the opposite problem.
There is so much left to write,
but I have little left to live,
and have really gotta fight
to give all I need to give;
the songs of hope within my heart,
they ought to see the light of day,
and though I am torn apart,
I will sing them anyway,
for cancer’s not the curse it seems
(though it surely ain’t much fun);
it gives substance to the dreams
that slow-revolve around the Son
to bring me out, to the last breath
to where I’m ever safe from death.
Thankyou for being brave enuf to share your reality today/this week. I think everyone in these covid times experiences days when it is all we can do to just get from one hour to the next. May you move beyond this moment when the spirit deems you ready. Perhaps it’s a breather you need?
As you note, some hours are more difficult than others. It helps to write my feelings, which is really a prayer. I’ve learned that God provides if I can remain present. Peace.
“I will sing them anyway” – thank you Andrew.